RONAN COGHLAN IS OUR MARKETING GENIUS

I have never pretended to be any sort of businessman. My mother always told me that money was vulgar, and sniffed haughtily at the idea that any of her descendants would go into 'Trade'. Add to that my anti-capitalist philosophy and you will see why my ethic of being a NON-businessman is so strong.

However, I do have one idol in the world of commerce. The late lamented Reginald Iolanthe Perrin whose commercial GROT empire was such a success in the 1970s. All too often I have followed his sage commercial precepts, but now I am doing something completely unlike him. For reasons known only to himself, his scriptwriters and all the folk wot watched series 2 back in 1977, he met an 'Irish Stereotype' in a pub and promoted him to 'Head of Forward Planning.'

I would never do anything like that, so I have asked our old friend Ronan Coghlan to run the - previously moribund - CFZ Press publicity department and the CFZ Press Facebook Page. I am convinced that he will do a splendid job, to be sure.