LIZ CLANCY: Cryptokid Part Two

I'm sorry but I really dont see the big fuss about this lake monster video. Big deal. Last night new cryptokid on the block, Leo Carney, made a MUCH better discovery, and yes, as you can see, we have a picture.

The Heywood Burney Dragon (pictured with Master Carney, who caught it - what a clever boy!) is an interesting cryptid. Generally speaking, there are three distinct types: green, which goes around spewing 'burney' out of his mouth at people because he's very naughty; the red, which also spews 'burney' out of his mouth because he's very naughty too, but which also loudly goes CHOMP CHOMP on the victim; and finally, the yellow burney dragon. This chap is a decent soul; a reformed soul; he spends his days using his burney powers to cook burger and chips, or whatever meal happens to take the ovenless Heywoodite's fancy. Red and green Burney dragons can be reformed. If a child of less than five is brave enough (as Leo was last night) to go up to one of these heinous critters and shout "No! No! That's naughty! Don't do it no mores!" the green or red dragon will repent and over a period of a few weeks, his hide will transform into that of the jaundiced dragon, and he will proceed to York Street where he will be trained by the head burney dragon chef at Veenas restaurant.

For those of you who are now wondering for my sanity, YOU try being locked in the vestibule for an hour by a two-year-old who wants to look for dragons out of the letterbox!